Relationships shouldn't be fair, they should be worth it.

Sacrifice (sac.ri.fice; noun) - the act of giving up something that you want to keep especially in order to get or do something else or to help someone.

    Something I have always struggled with is giving more than I am given, but looking at it all ass backwards. Growing up in a society where everything you do needs a post followed by a lot of likes in order to hold value to you really messes with your self-confidence. I am so guilty of this toxic feeling. Not that you shouldn’t post pictures, videos and status, you just shouldn’t let them control your happiness. I take pictures of everything; everywhere I go for the memories so I can look back and relive them all over again. It’s a habit of mine that I never want to get over because people in pictures can change while the memories remain the same. My problem isn’t the pictures I take, it’s getting so wrapped up in the idea of how people will react to the post that follows the memory I forget to enjoy it in that moment. I love bragging, and sharing all these amazing moments I have that if the other doesn’t post about it in the way that I do I feel like my presence wasn’t worth the attention to them. How shaded can I get?! Validation for my relationship shouldn’t be competitive, I shouldn’t be looking for clarity through a social media post and if that’s what I’m basing my relationship off from maybe I’m not ready to be in one.

   Everybody knows that 50+50=100 but relationships aren’t a math equation; both sides should be giving 100% at all time regardless of how different each ones “all in” is. I read a quote once that went like this,

      “I gave you $10, he gave you $20. You felt that he was better just because he gave you more, but he had $200, and all I had was $10.” 
   
     That’s when it hit me, not everybody loves the same way you do and if they don’t you worry it’s not there. Just because someone isn’t posting about you on their social media accounts every time you’re together doesn’t mean they didn’t enjoy your company. If you buy your significant other a really expensive gift and they don’t buy one at equal value it doesn’t mean they don’t love you as much. There’s always going to be days here and there where you’re going to feel like you’re doing more than the other but that doesn’t mean you should stop what you’re doing in order to make it more “fair”. What matters most is how you treat each other when social media and other outside factors aren’t involved.

     If seeing the one you love makes your heart race a little faster, your smile a little brighter, and your stomach sore the next day from all the laughs you’ve share you’re already more fortunate than a lot of other people. Just because you’re not that week’s #MCM or #WCW doesn’t mean they’re not crushing on you every other day of the week. Just because things look peachy keen on social media doesn’t mean it’s filled with love behind closed doors and just because things aren’t posted all over for everyone else to see doesn’t mean there isn’t love outside of social media platforms. A successful and happy relationship is about someone who fights for what’s real when things get tough, it’s about someone who pushes you to be a better person than you are today and wants to help you reach your goals. A relationship is between two people, not you and how the world reacts to how you look to them.

     When you’ve been fortunate enough as I have to find someone that fills your heart without the constant, daily post and makes you realize the difference in value of their presence versus presents…you will find yourself realizing how little the thought of others bothers you. Give each other compassion, commitment, laughs, lots of kisses, cuddles, criticism when needed, a helping hand, support, memories and love. You will have a relationship far more valuable than a picture with hundreds of likes.

until next time.

xo

To my work best friend

     We bonded over awkward break room lunches, customer stories and our love for sarcasm. My over excitement and inability to be quiet and do nothing really evens out your RBF syndrome (it’s something you’re born with, I know you’re not reaaaally that bad) and thrill of sitting at home binge watching Netflix. 

     

      I was scared of you at first, you were really quiet and seemed to be the first out the door when the day was over, but it turns out we had a lot more in common than we thought. We have the same taste in music, share celebrity crushes, hate to love the Kardashians, we’re obsessed with Chinese food, wear the same shoe size and can conveniently fit into each other’s clothing. I’ve worked with you for 2 years now and almost daily we spend our lunches jamming out to trap music and the occasional Justin Bieber, eating Panera salads and fueling our shopping addiction. We’ve got to the point of knowing exactly what one is think just by our facial expressions and having code words and names for everything.  I spend more time with you than any other person in my life and we still choose to see each other outside of work..how you’re not sick of me yet is a mystery I hope I never solve. I can confide in you with anything and you always know the right thing to say and sometimes it’s nothing at all. You make me read the fine print when I’m online shopping and make sure to make fun of me when I order something from China that probably won’t come until 2020. You send me all the cat photos because you know how much I love cats and our text messages are completely consumed by inappropriate memes and links to celebrity gossip articles. Constantly pulling my head up on the days I want it to drag and making sure I get a little extra expresso in my coffee on long, early mornings. You help me grow everyday as a person, make work a place I look forward to going to everyday (so stop taking vacation days without me), calm me when I’m frustrated and always listen when I have more than an earful to say. We share laughs, frustrations, secrets, lunches, clothes and most importantly memories.

Thank you for making work not seem like work at all.

until next time.

xo

another crazy cat lady

For those who have looked at any of my social media accounts, you can see that I may or may not have a small addiction to my kitty so it only make sense that I write my next blog about him. (DUH!)

 

Its a funny story how I got him really, so my roommate at the time wanted a pet really bad. I previously had a puppy but between working full time, school and maintaining a social life I just wasn't able to provide him with all the attention he needed, and heck I knew nothing about raising a dog, so eventually I got rid of him. BUT he did go to a good home (a co-worker) who give him lots of love and lives close so I can visit anytime! So when she asked about getting one I thought was a good idea for her but I wasn't ready for something high maintenance. SOOO her boyfriend being all cute and such came over and surprised her with a kitten and we instantly fell INLOVE it was the cutest thing ever! So cuddly and playful and just all around cute (still name less at this point) she was so happy that it actually bummed me out a little bit not having one. Her cat would always sleep in my room so we joked that it was mine and not hers. So that next day I come home from work and there was another kitty, just for me! He was even more cute, and I'm not saying that just because he was mine...and cats being more low maintenance, I kept him.

Now, my roommate and I have known each other just about our whole lives, since third grade to be exact and our mothers were always close. She graduated in December of 2015 so we knew that we would soon be going our separate ways and wanted something cute that was "ours" so, she had a girl and I had a boy...the start of Bonnie and Clyde. Well, not the real start obviously, they're not criminals who fall madly in love they were brother and sister actually which is kind of twisted on our part but it was a cute idea at the time. We always had cute little family photos and even did Christmas cards with them! (little crazy, we know.)

 

 

 

 

 

So after she graduated and move to the Grand Rapids area for work, we both had our kitties that we unfortunately had to split up. I still have my crazy busy schedule but its really nice to come home to my sweet little Clyde who I constantly refer to as "Bubba". The best part too, LITER TRAINED. I tell you what, I was made to have cats because I am all about filling up a automatic feeder and water dish with a weekly liter scoop and not having to wake up in the middle of the night to let him out to the bathroom. Sure there are things I could go without, like the fact he enjoys climbing up my curtains until they fall down and playing with my hair while I try to sleep but I am so happy that I have my little companion that wasn't even a planned event in my life. I guess for as many impulsive decision that I make, they weren't all bad after all.



until next time.

xo

Just your abnormal girly girl

Hello and Welcome!

My name Elizabeth Squanda, but most people refer to me as Liz, Lizzie or Squan (I'm open to any nicknames really). I enjoy long walks on the beach and to my fridge, which luckily for me isn't a long walk at all.

I fill a lot of your basic college girl stereotypes. I love starbucks flavored coffee, I binge watch netflix and go out on week nights. I wear ugg boots in the winter with my white puffy coat. You can most likely find me with my phone in my hand or at the tanner. I enjoy wearing victoria secret "PINK" clothing and having sun kissed skin. I constantly struggle with perfecting the winged eyeliner and deciding if wearing heels to the bar is really a good idea or not. I have a larger than normal collection of gaudy necklaces, earrings, and shoes and always love an excuse to get all dolled up.

On the contrary, I am one crazy sports fan or as the girls at work call me, the ultimate cleat chaser. Without a doubt I would have to say that baseball is my numero uno. Aside from enjoying watching the sport and understanding whats going on, there tends to be quite a few lookers as well. (Brad Ausmus, Ben Verlander, David Wright..to name a few) Football being a close second (Christian McCaffrey), basketball (Steph Curry, Dwayne Wade), and then the rest of the sports I will watch but not know what's going on. Understandably, I like it more if I know whats going on.

Growing up with two brothers and a sporty mom was a blessing in disguise. Being that "tom boy" growing up, I was never introduced to make up and glitz and glamour until I was on my own and now I LOVE an excuse to get dolled up. However, I am completely comfortable cozied up on the couch in sweats and an oversized t-shirt watching the playoffs and eating my weight in chinese. So as much as I may appear to be your typical ditsy basic girl, you'll be surprised to find my eyes glued to the tv at the bar cursing like a sailor when the ref makes a bad call against my team and I wouldn't want it any other way.

Be someone who makes YOU happy.

Until next time

xo